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Quicksilver Hg4: Learning About Comparing Two Images

by Scott Metz on October 3, 2010


Quicksilver: the chronicles of a newcomer to the art of haiku



Quicksilver

Hg4


Learning About Comparing Two Images
By Laura Sherman


When I started writing haiku I thought one just had to express an idea in three lines. I focused on one image. Now I see the nuance of comparing two distinct images. When that puzzle piece clicked into place, a new door opened up for me.

Recently, I went to North Carolina (NC) with my family for a vacation. I was thinking about haiku (and this group) while I experienced the tranquility of mountains. I have taken to heart really looking at the world and writing from my experiences, so this seemed like the perfect opportunity!

Although I swore I’d stay offline, I couldn’t help checking in with my haiku buddies. With Alan Summer’s help (although he explained that I don’t need to credit him, I can’t help but include his name) I penned this:

Lake Cherokee an echo in each breaststroke

I had started with:

pine trees line
an arm of Lake Cherokee
breaststroke echoes

then I got to:

Lake Cherokee
I can hear my breath echo

as I swim breaststroke

What do you think? Which do you like best?

Here are two more I wrote, inspired by my family and NC:

cold river water
peach juice drips from my baby’s chin
as she shivers

(When Camille was almost two, I wanted to introduce her to peaches. I found a wonderful orchard and picked a few juicy ones. I then took her to a local river I loved, which was very cold, and sat with her there, so it wouldn’t make a huge mess.)

empty bucket
blueberry picking
with my toddler

(As one might predict, toddlers want to eat blueberries, not collect them.)

As always I would love to hear your thoughts on these haiku. How would you edit them?

And if you have any haiku to share, which illustrate the concept of comparing two images, please post them here in the comment section.


……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Quicksilver is a column on troutswirl, the blog for The Haiku Foundation, devoted to showcasing the questions, ideas, and evolution of a beginner to the art of haiku, Laura Sherman. Each installment will feature some of Laura’s new work as well as her ideas and thought-processes concerning them. It is hoped that readers will respond with reactions, ideas, and advice on her work and provide feedback on how she might develop and improve her craft.


4th POSITION

by Scott Metz on September 15, 2010

the blogspot for The Haiku Foundation’s academic journal
Juxtapositions: A Journal of Haiku Poetics & Culture (JUXTA)


4th POSITION


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ENCOUNTERS will be a section of JUXTAPOSITIONS that features the dialogue between contemporary poetry and haiku. We encourage you to submit essays about the encounter of contemporary poets and poetry and haiku. We are also currently seeking individual papers that introduce haiku to students. For further information about this and other open topics at JUXTA, contact the editor Tom D’Evelyn: juxta _at_ thehaikufoundation _dot_ org (replace _at_ and _dot_ with the appropriate symbols). —Tom D’Evelyn

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4th POSITION

by Matt M. Cariello


The following “Quiz” is meant to follow up on the conversation begun with Positions 1 and brought to a boil with Postions 2; please play along and answer at least one of the questions in the spirit in which it is posed before expanding on your own ideas.


Is Haiku Poetry?
A Quiz


1) Please circle all that apply:

All haiku are poetry.
Some haiku are poetry.
Poetry and haiku are completely different.
Poetry and haiku are indistinguishable.
None of the above.
All of the above.
Don’t be stupid.


2) Is this a haiku?

so much depends

upon

a red wheel

barrow

glazed with rain

water

beside the white

chickens.

(William Carlos Williams)

Please discuss your answer, using these questions as a guide: Why is/isn’t this a haiku? If it is a haiku, why? If it isn’t a haiku, what could you do to make it a haiku? Why would you want to do this?


3) Is this a poem?

the winter fly
I caught and finally freed
the cat quickly ate

(Issa, trans. Sam Hamill)

Please discuss your answer, using these questions as a guide: Why is/isn’t this a poem? If it is a poem, why? If it isn’t a poem, what could you do to make it a poem? Why would you want to do this?


4) How many journals/magazine publish both poetry and haiku, or review books of both poetry and haiku, on a regular basis? Please list:


5) Billy Collins’ 2006 book of haiku, She Was Just Seventeen, received which kind of response from readers and reviewers:

Favorable.
Unfavorable.
It was not reviewed.
That’s not haiku.
Who is Billy Collins?


6) Jane Reichhold’s 2008 book, Basho: the complete haiku, received which kind of response from readers and reviewers:

Favorable.
Unfavorable.
It was not reviewed.
That’s not poetry.
What’s a Basho?


7) Complete this sentence. Haiku is…

…what gets lost in translation.
…not the record of an event: it is an event.
…should not mean but be.
…just the evidence of life.
…being, not doing.
…an orphan of silence.
…a Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.
…minimally brief, semantically enfolded, clever, surprising, resistant, collocationally unusual or unique, mysterious, suggestive, humorous, clashing, disjunctive, irruptive, rhythmic, imagistic, sensual, and has a readily understandable vocabulary.
… a short poem.


8). (Circle all that apply.) Haiku written in English…
…isn’t really haiku.
…isn’t poetry.
…isn’t really in English.
…would give Basho fits.


9) (Circle all that apply.) Poems written in America are…
…advertisements for western imperialism.
…life distilled. (Gwendolyn Brooks)
…debased products of the university workshop system.
…giving Basho fits.


10) In conclusion, which of the following appear to be true?

All poetry is haiku.
All haiku is poetry.
It’s complicated.
It’s simple.


Sources for question number 7:
Robert Frost
Robert Lowell
Archibald MacLeish
Leonard Cohen
ee cummings
Charles Simic
answers.com
Richard Gilbert (in Positions 2)
…


❧


Matthew M. Cariello teaches in the English Department at Ohio State University; his essay on metaphor may be found in the 2010 summer issue of Modern Haiku.


1st POSITION

2nd POSITION

3rd POSITION

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
POSITIONS is a section of the blog for The Haiku Foundation’s haiku academic journal Juxtapositions: A Journal of Haiku Poetics & Culture (JUXTA), edited by Tom D’Evelyn. The space will be used for updates and topics related to the journal. Oftentimes, the posts will be excerpts from papers scheduled to appear in the journal. It is hoped that the posts/excerpts will inspire feedback that will help the author with revision of the piece for final publication in JUXTA.




Quicksilver Hg3: Learning About Seasonal Words

by Scott Metz on August 12, 2010


Quicksilver: the chronicles of a newcomer to the art of haiku



Quicksilver

Hg3


Learning About Seasonal Words
By Laura Sherman


One of the first things I learned about haiku is that each poem must contain a seasonal word. Sounded easy enough. I assumed that this was open to interpretation and that I could pick words that evoked different seasons for me.

As I studied further, I ran across the term “kigo.” Kigo is a Japanese seasonal word. These are set in stone. Students of haiku in Japan study a kigo dictionary, called a “saijiki,” to learn which words represent which seasons.

As I continued to explore this area I saw that some haiku poets branched from the kigo concept and sought seasonal words appropriate for their area. In a different discussion on Young Leaf #2 (here on troutswirl), I was intrigued by how seasonal words could vary depending on where you live in this world.

Lorin Ford pointed out that July is winter in Australia. I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t considered that before. Since I live in Florida, I never thought of it as anything but a summer word (a very hot, humid, sticky seasonal word).

I see there is a debate between the traditional kigo approach and the seasonal word concept (which is a bit more open to interpretation). I plan to study both approaches more and learn from each.

I do have trouble sometimes finding an appropriate kigo or seasonal word for my haiku. I know it isn’t a haiku without one.

I have been working on two haiku that have stumped me. For me “sandy” speaks of summer, but I know it isn’t a kigo. Does it work as a seasonal word?

returning—
my sandy footprints erased
webbed ones remain

Then the other has been with me for a while. I love going to the beach and watching the sun touch the horizon. It’s a special moment for me. It is also a little sad when the moment is gone and the sun has set.

red sun touches
distant aqua line—
deflating

So, for me both haiku speak of summer, but I suspect neither has a seasonal word. How does one “insert” a seasonal word without losing the poetry? I could make Line 1 of the second haiku: “red summer sun touches.” Or perhaps, “august sun touches,” which might infer that summer vacation is over as well. I prefer the original, but suspect it isn’t a haiku.

Can you help me sort this out?

What do you do when you write a haiku, which doesn’t contain a seasonal word?


……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Quicksilver is a column on troutswirl, the blog for The Haiku Foundation, devoted to showcasing the questions, ideas, and evolution of a beginner to the art of haiku, Laura Sherman. Each installment will feature some of Laura’s new work as well as her ideas and thought-processes concerning them. It is hoped that readers will respond with reactions, ideas, and advice on her work and provide feedback on how she might develop and improve her craft.


3rd POSITION

by Scott Metz on July 21, 2010

the blogspot for The Haiku Foundation’s academic journal
Juxtapositions: A Journal of Haiku Poetics & Culture (JUXTA)


3rd POSITION


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Jane Reichhold has written a thoughtful and controversial piece on haiku education for JUXTA 1. Here is her position paper. As a position paper, it is an act of resistance against what she sees as a trend in haiku culture. When you respond, please pause before you hit send: your response should be as much to something said here as to whatever is being said on the blog by your colleagues. The discipline of slow reading should be part of haiku culture, yes? —Tom D’Evelyn

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3rd POSITION

by Jane Reichhold


The movie Carolina opens with two small girls who were yelling at each other over some spilled coffee being lead into an alley and given huge butcher knives by their grandmother. There she  tells them to “fight it out” and leaves. As the scared girls walk toward each other, with fearful and tear-stained faces, the older one tells her younger sister, “We are not being raised right.”
 


The example also applies to haiku writers. 
 


It is up to us, those who have been writing haiku for some years, to stop acting as single experts and to set up the systems that will assure us of trained and educated teachers. Where to begin? 
 


First of all we have to see where we are, look at how haiku is being taught today, and think about what needs to be changed.
 


Haiku is one of the earliest poetry forms to be taught. Already in grade school, it needs to be taught correctly by teachers who have learned about it in the teacher training programs in the universities.
 


This opens the chicken and the egg situation. Who will teach the professors about haiku so they can in turn inform their students? Perhaps the most logical answer would be that we learn from the Japanese since haiku was first their poetry form. The fiasco with counting syllables is a fine example of how wrong that idea was.
 


No, we cannot give ourselves knives to whack at our poems and each other. We need to know, and then teach, and to teach to teachers the history of haiku, how haiku work in Japanese, how they work in English, how they are being used by contemporary writers, and how each person can discover what a haiku really is.


…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
POSITIONS is a section of the blog for The Haiku Foundation’s haiku academic journal Juxtapositions: A Journal of Haiku Poetics & Culture (JUXTA), edited by Tom D’Evelyn. The space will be used for updates and topics related to the journal. Oftentimes, the posts will be excerpts from papers scheduled to appear in the journal. It is hoped that the posts/excerpts will inspire feedback that will help the author with revision of the piece for final publication in JUXTA.




Quicksilver Hg2: One Step At A Time: Learning About Haiku

by Scott Metz on June 23, 2010


Quicksilver: the chronicles of a newcomer to the art of haiku



Quicksilver

Hg2


One Step At A Time: Learning About Haiku
By Laura Sherman


I had originally thought that syllable count was the driving force behind haiku, but after studying all the comments from my first article, I see that I was mistaken. Haiku is about poetry first.

I took the advice of my mentors from this amazing group of writers and started writing down my observations of the world around me. I purchased a little notebook and opened a new Word doc within each of my active computers, so that when a haiku thought hit me, I could write it down.

Writing down fragments of haiku, unedited ideas, really helped me. Some of these turned into haiku, while others wait for further inspiration.

Whenever I tackle a new subject, I’ve learned to take things one step at a time. John Stevenson said it best when he advised, “I would start with a bit of advice about accepting advice: let it pass through you. However heavy the hand that offers it, whatever “authority” is behind it, let it go for now and give time time to work. I imagine this as a digestive process. However good something looks on the plate, there is only part of it that can be digested in such a way as to nourish one.”

For me learning is often a layered experience, where various nuances hit home at different stages.

I decided to focus on the poetry and the essence of the moment I wanted to capture. I tried not to be too concerned with structure, seasonal words, etc. It isn’t that I ignored the many elements we discussed, but I decided to work first on finding my voice.

Here are two poems I wrote after I had absorbed all of your advice, read wonderful haiku from others and then went out into the world and observed, writing notes in my little black notebook:


abandoned ship—
giggling playground for many
hermit crabs


wispy white lines
form characters—
summer sky haiku


Had I not been thinking with haiku, I might have missed these moments.

Did I succeed in sharing these moments with you? I would love to hear your thoughts on them.


……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Quicksilver is a column on troutswirl, the blog for The Haiku Foundation, devoted to showcasing the questions, ideas, and evolution of a beginner to the art of haiku, Laura Sherman. Each installment will feature some of Laura’s new work as well as her ideas and thought-processes concerning them. It is hoped that readers will respond with reactions, ideas, and advice on her work and provide feedback on how she might develop and improve her craft.


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