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The Haiku Foundation

end of summer …
in the pocket a seashell 
and phone number
- Marta Chocilowska
You are here: Home / Renku Sessions / The Renku Sessions: A Day of Snow 20

July 28, 2016 By John Stevenson 142 Comments

The Renku Sessions: A Day of Snow 20

renkuchainGreetings and welcome to The Haiku Foundation’s Fourth Renku Session: A Day of Snow. I am Marshall Hryciuk of Toronto Canada and i will be the leader of a 36-link Kasen renku. I’ve led over 40 of these linked-poem gatherings and my latest book, from Carleton Place, Canada is a selection of 15 of them, called petals in the dark.

Hello renku revelers! Here’s our verse 20:

recruitment of volunteers
for the hospice New Year’s Eve

            –Gabriel Sawicki

A generous sense of sympathy links this verse to the previous, joining the killing of innocents in “Bastille Day” to the surrender to the process of death by innocent patients in a hospice. These latter ones would still attempt the celebration or perhaps only the acknowledgement of renewal in spite of their own condition and this only expands the sense of generosity.

I like how the length of each of the two lines augments the vertical jolt of the previous verse, horizontally spreading its concern for the victims; “recruitment” being redoubled by the further potential in “volunteers” who may in turn then recruit even others.

“Hospice” first brings to my mind a place of palliative care for those who are about to succumb to AIDS and the HIV virus but more generally suggests a place of calm reserved for those with no hope of surviving an affliction. And this verse suggests their own brave solidarity with those who can vigorously celebrate the renewal of human culture.

A wonderful sense of extended and expanding humanity expressed in a direct and unadorned verse at a time when this kind of attention itself feels to be under attack. Thank you. Gabriel!

And for our next verse we need 3 lines, more of New Year’s as a seasonal renewal. The cast of nouns is completely open, save for repeating “New Year’s” or references to things that burn or people in uniforms.

Happy linking,
Marshall

 

A Day of Snow to Date

a day of snow
no one else
has come to the door

    –Marshall Hrycuik

coyote song closer
this longest night

    –Judt Shrode

incense lit
the scent of sage
lingers in a crowd

      –Maureen Virchau

bales of the second haying
stacked to the rafters

    –Paul MacNeil

dust from travelers
makes its slow descent
in the moonlight

    –steve smolak

faded jeans, school colors
and granny’s specs to match

    –Betty Shropshire

facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones

      –Barbara A. Taylor

balls of moss
exit the quaking forest

      –Carmen Sterba

in the garden shop
seed packets
arrayed alphabetically

      –Marilyn Potter

glasswing on the handle
of my butterfly net

      –Karen Cesar

a gypsy’s forecast
uttered to the sound
of rolling dice

    –Lorin Ford

trick-or-treaters skip
under a new moon

      –Maureen Virchau

horses’ foggy snorts
lead our morning jaunt
along the track

      –Marietta McGregor

scanning an empty platform
as the train chugs off

      –Shrikaanth Krishnamurthy

I sit in silence
behind the steering wheel
awhile

    –Paul Geiger

the ewe gently nudges
her lambs to move on

      –Mary Kendall

one white tulip
in a sunlit border
glows against the green

      –Marietta McGregor

another soul in the limelight
of #blacklivesmatter

      –Agnes Eva Savich

Bastille Day
fireworks
extinguished

      –Marion Clarke

recruitment of volunteers
for the hospice New Year’s Eve

    –Gabriel Sawicki

Filed Under: Renku Sessions Tagged With: A Day of Snow, Marshall Hryciuk, The Haiku Foundation, The Renku Sessions

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  23. Sachin Maan says

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    Reply
  24. Bittoo Sharma says

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    Reply
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  26. Augustus Fliger says

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  27. Lorin Ford says

    August 3, 2016 at 8:48 pm

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve

    –Gabriel Sawicki
    —
    gathered by his bed
    we all inhale deeply
    Canadian weed
    —
    💡
    – Lorin

    Reply
    • Lorin Ford says

      August 3, 2016 at 8:57 pm

      at his bedside
      we share around
      the Canadian weed
      —
      – Lorin

      Reply
  28. Lorin Ford says

    August 2, 2016 at 9:31 pm

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve

    –Gabriel Sawicki
    —
    as Red Monkey
    he swings through the window
    offering peaches
    —
    * 2016 is the Year of the Red Monkey. Peaches are a traditional New Year’s Day gift in China and Japan.
    http://www.chinesefortunecalendar.com/2016/Images/Monkey2016.jpg
    —
    http://product_images_rm.s3.amazonaws.com/blkzodiac-monkey/product/blkzodiac-monkey.jpg
    —
    – Lorin

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 11:08 pm

      guess i prefer passionfruit to peaches, Lorin -and would rather we didn’t conceptualize a whole year in our renku, even if it holds true for some people’s lives

      Reply
      • Lorin Ford says

        August 3, 2016 at 5:19 am

        What you will, naturally, Marshall, as far as your preferences for fruit goes, but I wouldn’t say that a traditional gift at the beginning of a year (as here) involves conceptualization of a whole year. I don’t get what you mean, but it’s not for the first time, so never mind.
        —
        – Lorin

        Reply
        • Lorin Ford says

          August 3, 2016 at 5:13 pm

          …and next morning, I’m still wondering what you might mean, Marshall. Perhaps it’s not peaches, but someone wearing a red monkey costume on New Year’s Day that would “conceptualize a whole year in our renku” ?
          If so, would you say that someone wearing a Santa Claus costume during the Christmas period in a renku verse would also “conceptualize a whole year” ?
          —
          – Lorin

          Reply
  29. Betty Shropshire says

    August 2, 2016 at 12:43 pm

    Howland Island
    long after the others
    give up hope

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 11:04 pm

      a reference to Amelia Earhart? for a New Year’s Eve verse? Betty, isn’t this a stretch too far?

      Reply
      • Betty Shropshire says

        August 3, 2016 at 7:15 am

        Yes and No…it’s that Howland Island is the last place in the world time wise for the New Year to begin…and Amelia still lives in our hearts and dreams as a strong woman who dared to think big.

        Reply
  30. Maureen Virchau says

    August 1, 2016 at 12:51 pm

    a temple bell’s ring
    through cloudless skies
    on the first dawn

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 11:00 pm

      poignant and lovely, Maureen, but it feels that something has been left out between the previous verse and this one

      Reply
  31. Marvyne Jenoff says

    August 1, 2016 at 9:58 am

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki

    storms, too, arrive,
    bring wind
    and breath

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 10:58 pm

      hi again, Marvyne -looks as if you’re trying to balance the new year’s arrival and greeting -and i’m looking for something that extends the previous verse’s spreading outreach

      Reply
  32. Marion Clarke says

    August 1, 2016 at 9:33 am

    they distribute
    shortbread and whisky
    for the toast

    Reply
    • Marion Clarke says

      August 1, 2016 at 9:34 am

      NB spelling of whiskey (Irish) changed to whisky for the traditional Scottish custom!

      Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 10:55 pm

      yeah, Marion, i’m aware of different spellings of the ‘life’s water’ in different cultures -looking to step out of custom here, i think

      Reply
  33. Marion Clarke says

    August 1, 2016 at 9:31 am

    they elect
    the dark haired visitor
    to be first footer

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 10:52 pm

      as is the custom, more or less, right, Marion? -maybe we need something a little less customary here

      Reply
  34. Marion Clarke says

    August 1, 2016 at 9:29 am

    all around the room
    they join hands and sing
    Auld Lang Syne

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 10:50 pm

      happy enough verse, Marion -but no gaiety to the verse itself -makes me feel we’re past this part of ‘group generic feeling’ in our ‘New Year’s section’

      Reply
  35. Marion Clarke says

    August 1, 2016 at 9:26 am

    distributing
    lumps of coal and promises
    to visit Scotland

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 10:46 pm

      kind of a summary response to the ‘first foot’ suggestions, eh, Marion -pretty cold and usually empty lumps and promises

      Reply
  36. Marion Clarke says

    August 1, 2016 at 9:09 am

    we make a toast
    to Dad with the whiskey
    we’ve snuck in

    Reply
    • Marion Clarke says

      August 1, 2016 at 9:22 am

      oops – weird line break!

      a toast to Dad
      with the whiskey
      we’ve snuck in
      .
      BTW we really did take a nightcap into the local hospice (for terminal cancer patients) in a little medicine bottle when my father was dying, so although it wasn’t New Year’s Eve, it is based on something that happened five years ago this month.
      .
      or
      .
      a toast
      to our father’s health
      with illicit whiskey

      Reply
      • Marshall Hryciuk says

        August 2, 2016 at 10:45 pm

        so very strong linking to the hospice part, none to the New Year’s, Marion -and i understand that just from reading this verse you wouldn’t know it wasn’t in fact at New Year’s Eve -but i want something ‘still spreading outward’ in this link

        Reply
  37. Lorin Ford says

    August 1, 2016 at 7:28 am

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve

    –Gabriel Sawicki

    —
    yesterday’s revels
    fade into a catheter’s
    drip, drip
    —
    -Lorin

    Reply
    • Lorin Ford says

      August 2, 2016 at 4:59 am

      But it’s likely that any sign of liquids in this verse, even if they’re not water as such, takes us back to last-but-one’s “extinguished”.
      Hmmm…

      —

      – Lorin

      Reply
      • Marshall Hryciuk says

        August 2, 2016 at 10:39 pm

        I could see some liquids going into this verse, Lorin -just not the ones that go into a catheter -could put the whole year ‘in the tank’, so to speak

        Reply
  38. Patrick Sweeney says

    August 1, 2016 at 3:23 am

    water of the last moment
    a finger dipped
    in champagne

    -Patrick

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 10:36 pm

      so more a homage to the past year than a salute to the new, Patrick?

      Reply
  39. Gabriel Sawicki says

    August 1, 2016 at 2:46 am

    Thanks. I’m honored that my verse is part of this renku.

    Reply
  40. Marilyn Humbert says

    August 1, 2016 at 1:45 am

    after the holidays
    I put on my suit
    and return to work

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 10:34 pm

      very hum-drum, Marilyn -“the holidays” could group “Bastille Day”with “New Year’s” which we don’t want to do

      Reply
  41. Aalix Roake says

    July 31, 2016 at 10:25 pm

    two drunks
    toast each other
    as baloons fall

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      August 2, 2016 at 10:31 pm

      cheerful enough, Aalix -but wouldn’t the balloons be rising? -or it’s so late they’ve (the balloons) lost their buoyancy and are sinking -which is not very positive for our hospice-goers

      Reply
  42. Mary Kendall says

    July 31, 2016 at 10:08 pm

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki
    .
    .
    doling out portions
    of Hoppin’ John
    to hungry visitors

    Reply
  43. Mary Kendall says

    July 31, 2016 at 10:08 pm

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki
    .
    .
    at the food kitchen
    serving bowls
    of Hoppin’ John

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 10:12 pm

      moves us a bit, Mary -but goes mostly sideways from the hospice, almost in parallel to the previous verse -gotta avoid that

      Reply
      • Mary Kendall says

        August 1, 2016 at 12:12 am

        What about the alternate I posted that doesn’t allude to the food kitchen? Sharing Hoppin’ John with anyone who stops by is a way of wishing luck and good fortune in the new year.
        .
        .
        doling out portions
        of Hoppin’ John
        to hungry visitors

        Reply
  44. paulgeiger says

    July 31, 2016 at 7:20 pm

    the promise
    of new problems
    and some leftovers

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 10:10 pm

      nice wit here, Paul -but except for the tummy’s impulses, not much that appeals to the senses

      Reply
  45. paulgeiger says

    July 31, 2016 at 7:14 pm

    a new year promises
    new problems and
    some leftovers

    Reply
    • paulgeiger says

      July 31, 2016 at 7:18 pm

      Oops. New year rep. Argh.

      Reply
  46. Marilyn Humbert says

    July 31, 2016 at 6:20 pm

    after the storm
    cathedral bells ring out
    announcing genesis

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 10:09 pm

      “genesis” seems totally gratuitous here, Marilyn -“after the storm” recalls the opening line of our renku as well

      Reply
  47. Betty Shropshire says

    July 31, 2016 at 5:11 pm

    first-foot
    sharing his coin
    along with a whiskey

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 10:06 pm

      this one has promise, Betty -and does address the hospice setting -thanks, i’ll consider this one again

      Reply
  48. Judt Shrode says

    July 31, 2016 at 12:08 pm

    glossy photograph
    of a sunrise
    on the new calendar

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 10:03 pm

      I guess you’ll know by the time you read this, Judt, i’m on the outs with calendars for this link

      Reply
  49. Carmen Sterba says

    July 31, 2016 at 11:59 am

    a monk inspects
    the fresh calligraphy
    of his apprentices

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 10:01 pm

      this has a lot of ‘New Year’s’ to it Carmen -but not much of a link to our fist ‘New Year’s’ verse

      Reply
    • Carmen Sterba says

      August 1, 2016 at 1:06 pm

      I thought the connection between volunteers and apprentices has a subtle link because those who volunteer and those who are apprentices often become full-timers.

      Reply
      • Marshall Hryciuk says

        August 2, 2016 at 10:26 pm

        well, it is a link, Carmen -but these are not the kind of volunteers i’m looking for here

        Reply
  50. Judt Shrode says

    July 31, 2016 at 11:38 am

    12 unmarked pages
    in the fresh calendar

    Reply
    • Judt Shrode says

      July 31, 2016 at 11:49 am

      Oops!!!

      Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:59 pm

      don’t want something measured like a calendar here, Judt -looking for something moving through and out of the hospice

      Reply
  51. Marion Clarke says

    July 31, 2016 at 11:23 am

    at midnight
    ships greet each other
    on the lough

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:56 pm

      too far afield, Marion, from the hospice

      Reply
  52. Marion Clarke says

    July 31, 2016 at 11:18 am

    the peal of bells
    from rejoicing villages
    on both sides of the bay

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:55 pm

      this is much better, Marion -and we could leave out the first “the” and the “on” on line 3 and make it even more immediate -will consider again, thanks

      Reply
      • Marion Clarke says

        August 1, 2016 at 9:04 am

        Nice suggestion, Marshall. : )

        Reply
  53. Marion Clarke says

    July 31, 2016 at 11:11 am

    after the party
    mountain water washes
    the old year away

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:53 pm

      don’t need to hear about the old year, Marion -even during the party -let’s look forward

      Reply
  54. Marietta McGregor says

    July 31, 2016 at 4:37 am

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki

    .

    all of us gathered
    as bluewater sailors
    reach the river

    Reply
  55. Marietta McGregor says

    July 31, 2016 at 4:35 am

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki

    .

    all of us gathered
    as bluewater yachts
    sail in

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:50 pm

      interesting, Marietta, in that it makes the speaker part of the recruited -i’ll have another look at this one, thanks

      Reply
  56. Michael Henry Lee says

    July 31, 2016 at 4:34 am

    like so many dominoes
    one broken resolution
    quickly follows another

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:48 pm

      once you have a simile you have too much distance from your subject in renku, Michael Henry

      Reply
  57. Marietta McGregor says

    July 31, 2016 at 4:33 am

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki

    all of us gathered
    to celebrate
    the bluewater arrival

    Reply
  58. Maria Tomczak says

    July 31, 2016 at 1:57 am

    still attracts my attention
    a mountain landscape
    from the new calendar

    Reply
    • Judt Shrode says

      July 31, 2016 at 6:38 pm

      Hi Maria…didn’t see your “new calendar” until just now. :-/

      Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:47 pm

      not ‘crazy’ about these calendrical offerings, Maria -I want something that links and shifts to a possible New Year’s gathering at a hospice

      Reply
  59. Marvyne Jenoff says

    July 30, 2016 at 10:13 pm

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki

    snow, too, arrives
    and wind
    and breath

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:45 pm

      good to hear from you, Marvyne -refreshing cadences here, but can’t use it because it repeats “snow” from our hokku -and actually part of the title

      Reply
  60. Lorin Ford says

    July 30, 2016 at 8:17 am

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve

    –Gabriel Sawicki

    —
    missing you
    I begin the year
    in the green room of a wave
    —
    – Lorin

    Reply
  61. Lorin Ford says

    July 30, 2016 at 6:50 am

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve

    –Gabriel Sawicki
    —

    the first day
    on pause in the green room
    of a wave
    —
    – Lorin

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:43 pm

      yes, Lorin, we can’t repeat the word, “year” but this relates to the previous verse only vaguely

      Reply
  62. Jennifer Sutherland says

    July 30, 2016 at 12:28 am

    a ceramic bowl
    of nanakusa
    held with both hands

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:41 pm

      looking for how this links to the scene in the hospice, Jennifer -whereas in ‘Current Events’ the immediate time-line links the two verses of the section, i’m treating “new Year’s’ as an organic seasonality and the two verses still need to have some tangible link between them

      Reply
  63. Barbara A. Taylor says

    July 29, 2016 at 10:46 pm

    beaming with joy
    the first visitor presents
    a tray of passionfruit

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 31, 2016 at 9:36 pm

      liked this Barbara, but my response didn’t take -but i’ll be keeping this around for another look -appreciate that you actually linked to the previous ‘scene’

      Reply
  64. Marietta McGregor says

    July 29, 2016 at 6:03 pm

    a girl baby arriving
    just past midnight
    makes the morning news

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 29, 2016 at 10:53 pm

      usually because she wins the parents prizes, Marietta -I don’t take this kind of popular culture to be a positive thing -and if you mean it that way, we’re not looking for irony or judgment here

      Reply
      • Marietta McGregor says

        July 30, 2016 at 4:39 am

        Not really meaning to be ironic or judgmental, Marshall, but meant more as a signifier of welcoming a new beginning. It’s a bit of a longstanding Aussie ritual for local papers to feature the fhe first baby born in the early hours of every New Year. I made her a girl this time. Not sure if the parents get any prizes other than a nice photo op.

        Reply
        • Marion Clarke says

          July 31, 2016 at 10:55 am

          They do that here in Ireland too, Marietta. There are usually two or three babies on the front page next morning! 🙂

          Reply
          • Marshall Hryciuk says

            July 31, 2016 at 9:35 pm

            well the parent s do win prizes in the U.S. and Canada -but also this would link back to the ‘Curent Events’ (=news) section

        • Mary Kendall says

          July 31, 2016 at 9:48 pm

          This is done in the states too–they publish a picture of the mom and first baby born closest to midnight. No prizes go with it, just the excitement itself. 🙂

          Reply
  65. Patrick Sweeney says

    July 29, 2016 at 5:35 pm

    the year has flown
    below my Plimsoll line
    galaxies roar

    -Patrick

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 29, 2016 at 10:47 pm

      enthused relief from moral concerns, Patrick -thanks for that -I was hoping for a restatement of your neo-Neolithics banging their pots and pans and would probably have much more truck with this save for the third line -it even follows a full stop

      Reply
  66. Michael Henry Lee says

    July 29, 2016 at 3:42 pm

    paper lobsters hang
    in each window
    of the house

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 29, 2016 at 10:51 pm

      hi Michael Henry -I need help with “paper lobsters” -no idea what this refers to -please let me and us know

      Reply
      • Michael Henry Lee says

        July 30, 2016 at 5:29 am

        it is a Japanese New Year’s tradition I learned of from the net http://www.123newyear.com/newyear-traditions/japanese.html
        I never have had the opportunity to visit Japan so I’m hopeful it is accurate. Apparently it is A Shinto related belief,” •Japanese make lobsters with paper and decorate their house with them. They think that they back side of the lobsters resembles an aged person, which symbolizes an earnest desire for endurance”

        Reply
        • Marshall Hryciuk says

          August 2, 2016 at 10:23 pm

          thanks for the info, Michael -shift from hospice to a person’s house of long-living too jarring for me

          Reply
  67. Michael Henry Lee says

    July 29, 2016 at 3:40 pm

    a fresh start
    begins with well wishes
    for all

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 29, 2016 at 10:38 pm

      joining in the homilies, eh, Michael Henry -there’s no need to preach, even subtly -we need acute and palimpsest observations

      Reply
  68. Carlos Colon says

    July 29, 2016 at 12:42 pm

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki
    —
    Roman candles
    I snap open a new package
    of underwear

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 29, 2016 at 10:36 pm

      fun, Carlos, but “underwear” a bit rough linking to an AIDS hospice -also “new” here totally redundant

      Reply
  69. Maureen Virchau says

    July 29, 2016 at 11:31 am

    Congratulations, Gabriel! A salient and poignant verse. Excellent choice, Marshall. Your commentary is highly affecting.
    *
    an ancient pine
    fills with sparrows
    on the first dawn

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 29, 2016 at 10:34 pm

      upbeat and hinting at abundance, Maureen -the link might be a bit tenuous, but i’ll consider this again later -thanls

      Reply
  70. Betty Shropshire says

    July 29, 2016 at 8:26 am

    the wake up call
    to fat shaming
    myself off the scales

    Reply
    • Betty Shropshire says

      July 29, 2016 at 8:45 am

      or:
      …
      the wake up call
      marking the new calendar
      with my first X

      Reply
      • Marshall Hryciuk says

        July 29, 2016 at 10:31 pm

        didn’t mean the New Year’s verse to be a confessional, Betty -we’re looking for a turn to the positive here -sorry but scales and calendars leave me cold

        Reply
  71. Maria Tomczak says

    July 29, 2016 at 3:22 am

    with a trembling hand
    she writes the first note
    in new calendar

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 29, 2016 at 10:29 pm

      I think, Maria, it needs to be ‘on the new calendar’ that would make for three articles in three lines and you’re probably trying to avoid that -but it doesn’t ‘work’ as it is

      Reply
      • Maria Tomczak says

        July 30, 2016 at 1:51 pm

        Hi Marshall.
        Yes, I was trying to avoid the last article. In my native language there are no articles at all so sometimes it is problematic for me where I should write an article and where it is not necessary.

        Reply
  72. paulgeiger says

    July 28, 2016 at 11:01 pm

    after the solstice
    there is joy in
    two new beginnings

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 28, 2016 at 11:48 pm

      still has a bit of the liturgical to it, Paul -the “joy” here feels a bit too rarefied

      Reply
  73. Mary Kendall says

    July 28, 2016 at 6:55 pm

    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki
    .
    .
    each new day
    growing longer as
    darkness diminishes

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 28, 2016 at 11:45 pm

      we need some sort of emotional appeal in our verses, Mary -give us something particular in one new day to involve our senses

      Reply
  74. Mary Kendall says

    July 28, 2016 at 6:54 pm

    An excellent transition, Gabriel. Congratulations!
    .
    .
    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve
    –Gabriel Sawicki
    .
    .
    in the beginning
    death and life
    rebirth and renewal

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 28, 2016 at 11:43 pm

      too Biblical, Mary

      Reply
  75. Lorin Ford says

    July 28, 2016 at 6:09 pm

    Nice verse, Gabriel,
    —
    hmmm, Marshall: “3 lines, more of New Year’s as a seasonal renewal.” Perhaps Chinese New Year is that, in the Northern hemisphere. But by the Western calendar it’s the dead of winter or the height of Summer.
    —
    recruitment of volunteers
    for the hospice New Year’s Eve

    –Gabriel Sawicki
    —
    Pope Gregory’s year
    begins January 1st
    but the bears sleep on
    —
    – Lorin

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 28, 2016 at 11:43 pm

      yes, Lorin -i think it’s my innovation to have New Year’s considered as a season section since it’s one that the Japanese sabaki i know of don’t use but i do it because it’s such a ‘human season’ in Japan where for instance one tries to pay all one’s debts down to zero to start the new calendar year with a reconciled and clean slate. Also, so many people in Japan, poets and most everyone literate wishes someone else good luck in the ‘new year’ = next complete cycle, during this part of the year -it has a ‘physical season’ component that happens between winter and spring, so i don’t use a fall season section before it or a spring season section after it.
      So, paradoxically, i’m abstracting a specifically Japanese ‘season’ and using it in a way a Japanese sabaki would not.
      So your verse makes clear the disjunction of most natural seasonalities of New Year from the human cultural New Year but this disjunction is not what i’m looking for here

      Reply
      • Lorin Ford says

        July 30, 2016 at 5:16 am

        Hi Marshall,
        This is my favourite Japanese New Year haiku:
        —
        New Year’s Eve cleaning
        The carpenter hangs a shelf
        in his own house
        – Basho
        —
        Written long ago by Basho, but just as relevant today. Some things about human nature seem common cross cultures and across time. Any tradesman’s wife, world wide, will attest that L 3 shows a remarkable situation indeed. 🙂
        —
        – Lorin

        Reply
  76. Michael Henry Lee says

    July 28, 2016 at 11:57 am

    down wind
    of the first
    warm day

    Reply
    • Marshall Hryciuk says

      July 28, 2016 at 11:24 pm

      again, Michael Henry an intriguing first offering -little too ‘clipped’ after the ‘short three line’ to ‘long two line’ of the previous two links -also, since presenting this as a season “first/ warm day” would confuse this with spring for a reader of renku

      Reply

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